The book is written by Amy Chua, an Asian professor of law at Yale. Among other things, it claims Chinese mothers are better parents than Western mothers. Chua defines superior parenting as "denying your children individuality and shaming them when needed (in order to motivate)." New York Magazine included this short list of things that Amy's two children are NOT allowed to do:
Get any grade less than an A, not be the No. 1 student in every subject except gym and drama, play any instrument other than the piano or violin, not play the piano or violin, choose their own extracurricular activities.
Heeding this woman's parenting advice will result in one of two things IF effective:
Scenario 1) You raise Hitler (or Hitlet) incarnate. Sure, it's unlikely that Ms. Chua is raising crazed antisemitic dictators, but a sociopath? No doubt.
Scenario 2) This child star/stage mom parenting style will result in hellish rebellion and/or serious mental issues. Best case scenario is Nicole Richie. Worst case is Michael Jackson (in which case the rebellion and mental issues are accompanied by continued and relentless rhinoplasty).
The 3rd (and best) alternative is that the child grows up to be normal in spite of the whack jobs who will take credit for their offspring's success and well adjustment.
Bottom line is, Chua is ill-equipped. She is quoted in her article as saying "The truth is I'm not good at enjoying life." Ohhh perfect. Because "enjoying life" is low on the reason-for-our-existence totem pole. It's the last thing I'd want for my child. Riiiiiight. I'd sooner buy "the Lindsay Lohan Guide to Sobriety." At least she's aware of, and working on her deficiencies.
Chua is highly educated, but specializes in global sustainability and international business affairs. Why she has any credibility as a parental expert, I do not know. What disturbs me is the fact that there will be idiots all over who will readily be guided by these words of (non) wisdom. Without the slightest bit of hesitancy, upon completion of the book, mindless mothers all over the nation will voraciously snatch the cheeseburgers from their children's hands, and jump in the family wagon. Off to use the visa to purchase a violin.
God forbid we raise critical and independent thinkers. We're really striving for wealthy, Chopin-like, pseudo nazi's.
Now this is a literary review! If my potential purchase would mean the difference between Professor Amy Chua having financial security, and sleeping on the streets... I would say she needs to get used to sleeping with the sweet smell of exhaust fumes, because I would not think about buying her book!
ReplyDeleteBased on your blog, it seems that she possesses the sort of intellectual force that makes someone look intellectual, but not smart.
A law professor might be a good example of someone who has made it professionally... but that is by no means a qualification as a parenting expert as you noted. Still, we are all entitled to our opinions, but hers seem to fly directly in the face of psychology.
China is a historic, and wonderful nation. I have nothing but respect for the Chinese people. However, the West is a better place to live than China. There is more hope, and more progress in the West than in China. China has a dictatorial, and disgusting government. Our economy is three times the size of China. Not that economics directly relates to parenting ability... but if the Chinese had fundamentally better parenting models to offer, I'd think you would see the best, and brightest China has to offer making it big in China... as opposed to in the West. Also, you would probably see Westerners going to the West...
Her view on parenting seems simplistic, and one dimensional. Her model treats a child as a robot, as opposed to a human. We can argue about if this is heartless or not... but certainly it is overly simplistic. Perhaps she would be better at raising a virtual pet? I am sure it would win her a ribbon, or two.
I do not plan on reading anything from professor Chua after reading this post, but one thing i will say about her is those parenting skills are top notch. Now I don't have any kids but I am starting to practice the teachings on my cats. Still no matter how many times I make Monkey (my cat) practice, he is pretty horrible at the violin and piano. I think it is partly due to the lack of opposable thumbs. Regardless of her I'll advised teaching methods I will take them into consideration, but only for a good laugh. I sure won't let her nor any Asians, for that matter, near my cats though.
ReplyDeleteI can't believe somebody published a parent philosophy like that. Yikes.
ReplyDeleteThanks Patrick! Agreed. I like the part about her getting used to the smell of exhaust fumes. :)
ReplyDeleteSteven, HAHA. I told you what I think about cats. Those dingleberry mofos.
And Lightning Bug's Butt, *sigh* I never cease to be amazed by America's abundance of assholes. All jokes (and alliteration) aside, people scare me.
What I want to know is, if the uncritically thinking masses were to actually follow her parenting advice:
ReplyDelete1) Does anyone see a problem with almost everyone expecting their kids to be #1?
2) How are we going to create an orchestra with only pianists and violinists?
and
3) Where exactly are creative ideas supposed to come from if we all resort to groupthink?
It's o.k., we don't really need scientific breakthroughs, new technology, or cures for deadly diseases. No biggie...